Alanis has made amends with us about "Ironic"

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My manlove and I got to see “Jagged Little Pill” last weekend on Broadway. Shoutiest of shout-outs to Nana Red for watching the offspring over the weekend that we ran away from home.

Microreview: the show is very, very good. The talent on stage overfloweth, from choreography to song arrangement to the book, which was written by Diablo Cody. I wouldn’t say the musical is a timeless work of unparalleled brilliance, but the songs and dialogue hang together pretty seamlessly, the character portraits are interesting, and you leave feeling hopeful, with a whole new appreciation for the Alanis Morissette canon.

Oh, Alanis. You really cannot say the name “Alanis,” even 25 years after “Jagged Little Pill” dropped, without asking the rhetorical, “Isn’t it ironic?” And you would not be the first to crucify Canada’s songstress for what amounts to a variety of cliched couplets that completely misunderstand the very concept of irony, conflating these supposedly inconvenient and upsetting things that happen with something that is so tragically coordinated it, well, figurrrrrres.

The song was an instant banger when I was in high school in Ohio where on any given Friday night, my friends and I would be doing our very best white girl howls along to “Ironic” and “You Oughta Know” as if we had any kind of romantic history that even came close to meriting that brand of bitterness. It was such a big moment to own CDs that you played nonstop and shared and left in other people’s cars by accident because they had jimmied their portable CD player to their car stereo and weren’t we all just living that high tech lifestyle on wheels?

Since that time, CD players are practically obsolete in cars, and I no longer think LLBean barn coats are the height of fashion per the contract of every Catholic high schoolie in 1996. But I still think “ironic” is a banger even if the irony is ill-conceived.

And I think we should all treat it as “Jagged Little Pill” the musical does: as a miscalculation by a young writer. Just like people should stop asking Ali MacGraw what she meant when she said “Love means never having to say you’re sorry.“ She’s sorry, all right? And Rebecca Black would like to forget she knows anything about any day of the week.

Perhaps I’ve become some kind of apologist for white women who make regrettable art in their youth. Maybe I need to examine deeper the implications of that. But I’m here as a writer showing up to do my utmost to synthesize my best ideas with my best dedication to the page. Just don’t show me the unadulterated copy from ten years ago. Or five months ago. Or last week. We’re all works in progress but our art evolves. I’d like to think I give as much passage and permission for other women to groove on with their bad, evolving, artistic selves—as much as I would hope the same is granted for myself.

2k19 Wrap

These are usually fun in that old AOL e-mail forwardy kind of way, so I’ll bite. And please share if you do, too.

1. What did you do in 2019 that you’d never done before?

We went on a legit Cape Cod beach vacation with a dog for a week.
Became an usher at the BSO Symphony
Worked at the JFK Library
Visited New Orleans

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

Felt like I got some traction in therapy. That was a huge one for me.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

My cousins Sean and Katie welcomed their doll Kayleigh. I imagine there are more but I haven’t held any babies lately and this is regretful.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

My husband’s granny passed last weekend. She was a firecracker.

5. What countries did you visit?

Oh, Canada (Toronto - Summer)

6. What would you like to have in 2020 that you lacked in 2019?

A book deal, more boundaries around my work, more dates with my hubs.

7. What dates from 2019 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

Sat with a dying grandmother-in-law in her nursing home bed while we just said “I love you” in Korean over and over and over.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

My mental health survived the winter and the rainiest April ever. Placed some ink in Huffington Post.

9. What was your biggest failure?

The essay that got the most views was ironically the biggest fail for me. I was not pleased with how it turned out and the response was a lot of spiritual battery.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

The longest depression of my adult life.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

I bought this book for under $10 and it was by far the best investment as a freelancer.

12. Where did most of your money go?

Not into any Dave Ramsey-approved piggy banks or projects, I can tell you that much.

13. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Monday barre class.
My former students Garrison and Simone getting married
Visiting Greg in his gayborhood in New Orleans

14. What song will always remind you of 2019?

I loved when my daughter sang/played this Rolling Stones ditty.

15. Compared to this time last year, are you:
 a) happier or sadder? 
b) thinner or fatter? 
c) richer or poorer?

I am so much happier, about the same weight, and not poorer because that would be impossible.

16. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Prayed, read my Bible.

17. What do you wish you’d done less of?

Been bossed around by my dog. She’s a dog. She can’t even clip her own nails. Why is she bossing me around?

18. How will you spend Christmas?

It’s a travel year so Ohio/Michigan.

19. Did you fall in love in 2019?

Yes, summarily into Fleabag Seasons 1+2.

20. What was your favorite TV program?

See above. I have now watched both seasons thrice.

21. What was the best book you read?

The Bright Hour by Nina Riggs was so good.

22. What was your greatest musical discovery?

Vaughn Williams Symphony No. 5. Melts me.

23. What did you want and get?

A strong relationship with both my kids. It has been gut-wrenching at times but so worth it.

24. What did you want and not get?

A pink Jeep like Malibu Barbie has.
President Trump off Twitter.

25. What was your favorite film of this year?

The Farewell

26. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I turned 39. I think I taught and then went to my night class at GrubStreet which has been fantastic.

27. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

My life isn’t that deep, yo.

28. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007?

Thrift on fleek.

29. What kept you sane?

My husband. Riding the MBTA, oddly enough. The Cut on Tuesdays podcast, which is ending and I haz the sads.

30. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

I mean who didn’t love PWB holding all her trophies?
I also was so happy when Anne Lamott got married.

31. What political issue stirred you the most?

Mostly was obsessed with the crisis at the border and Impeachment.

32. Who did you miss?

Barack Obama, Friends in Tennessee

33. Who was the best new person you met?

Super grateful for all the new coworker friends I’ve made. They do not tell you this is the actual factual slice of fun of being an employed grown person.

34. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2019.

God will use whatever means necessary to get our attention and let us know we are loved. Even our dogs. Even quicksand. Maybe both at the same time.



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